she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
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she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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