I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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