I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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