Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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