yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize