I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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