I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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