I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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