I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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