trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize