I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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