guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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