If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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