You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize