she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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