i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize