No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize