If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
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