you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
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his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
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If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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