yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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