all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize