Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
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Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
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I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
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