i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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