Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
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