I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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