What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize