is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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