I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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