why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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