There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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