Sry I called you an 8
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize