Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
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Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
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