Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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