i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize