Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize