so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
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he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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