i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
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Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
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I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
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