there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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