I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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