She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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