2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
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