Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
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party gras won. party gras always wins.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
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I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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