once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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