That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
You need Xanax blowdarts
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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