Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize