I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize