I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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