I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize