Non-Jews are for practice
our cab driver is having phone sex.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
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