I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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