It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Randomize